This past week has been very hard.  A friend was killed in a car accident.  A friend Kenny and I met years ago and recently reconnected with.  She was a 36 year old mama of two and a wife to one of Kenny’s best friends from high school.

Matt and Rachelle were married shortly after I moved to CO and the four of us really enjoyed being together.  We went white water rafting, enjoyed a murder mystery dinner party together, and Rachelle began the book club that I’m still a part of today.  Matt is a marine and his career took them around the country and then overseas.  Recently we reconnected with Rachelle and their kids; meeting up for lunch after church several times.

The news of the accident was heart-breaking and I immediately felt sick to my stomach. Her kids were air-lifted to Denver and after a few days were released from the hospital. Kenny and I attended Rachelle’s memorial service Saturday and it was one of the most difficult funerals I’ve been to.  Listening to her son cry through the service was almost too much to bear.  I cried so much that my head pounded for the rest of the day.

The loss of Rachelle is painful but we are so thankful that she knew Jesus.  His love in her was contagious – she always wore a smile and her laughter was always present.  She is whole now and complete; sitting at the feet of Jesus.  For this, we rejoice.

But that doesn’t mean we are to ignore our feelings of grief.  This has been on my mind daily for almost a week now and I’m still processing through what God wants me to take away.  I think I’ve finally figured it out.

Our life on this earth is fleeting.  It will end and God already has our days numbered.  What will we do with the time we have here?  Will we love well?  Will we tell our family how much we love them rather than assume they know?  Will we show kindness to others even when it’s inconvenient and uncomfortable?  Or will we stay in our bubble of security and assume someone else will come along to help?  God doesn’t promise us tomorrow, but rather asks us to show the love of Christ today.

Our lives can change in an instant.  All of us drive every day assuming it will never be us in an accident.  We take this privilege for granted and so often forget to pray for protection every time we get behind the wheel.  After I heard the news about Rachelle, I honestly didn’t want to drive anywhere.  I was fearful and scared instead of turning to my Protector and asking for His help.

Two different books I’ve been reading lately have stood out to me this week in light of this news.

From Jesus Calling, September 11:
“Rejoice in Me always!  No matter what is going on, you can rejoice in your Love-relationship with Me.  This is the secret of being content in all circumstances.  So many people dream of the day when they will finally be happy; when they are out of debt, when their children are out of trouble, when they have more leisure time, and so on.  While they daydream, their moments are trickling into the ground like precious balm spilling wastefully from overturned bottles.  
Fantasizing about future happiness will never bring fulfillment, because fantasy is unreality.  Even though I am invisible, I am far more Real than the world you see around you.  My reality if eternal and unchanging.  Bring your moments to Me, and I will fill them with vibrant Joy.  Now is the time to rejoice in My Presence!  
Philippians 4:4,12; Psalm 102:27

I mentioned several days ago that I’ve been reading The Life Giving Home by Sally & Sarah Clarkson.  As I finished the chapter about gathering in and preparing for the changing seasons ahead, the questions at the end were quite convicting.

As you put effort into preparation, what are you anticipating?  Are you putting your hope in passing things, or are you and your family investing in the Kingdom, toward an inheritance that will last for eternity?  How does this view affect your approach to relationships, faith, personal memories, discipleship, family activities, and every aspect of your life?  

Ouch.  How much are we talking with our kids about things of eternal value rather than the hustle bustle of school and activities?  Do they know that Jesus is all that really matters? So much of what children learn is caught, not taught.  What are they catching from Kenny and myself?  More of Jesus or more earthly matters that will pass away?

“For this reason you also must be ready; for the Son of Man is coming at an hour when you do not think He will.” Matthew 24:44
What do you think it means to be ready for Jesus?  What would a home that is ready look like?  What would happen there?  

These last questions have really been on my heart this week.  I don’t know when my time on this earth will end.  Maybe I’ll meet Jesus before He returns to this earth or maybe He’ll return during my lifetime.  No one knows.  What I do know is that it is my responsibility to make my heart ready.  Am I ready?  Am I right with Him?  Have I forgiven those I need to forgive, repented of my sin or am I still holding on to something?  I want to be ready.  I want to have a pure heart before God.  I want Kenny and James and Anna to know how much I love them.  I want my children to know that their relationship with Christ is all that matters in this life.  It is THE most important thing.

I am sad that Rachelle is gone from us and will miss her.  I am grateful for the time this week to examine my life and think on these things.  Tragedy can sometimes push us away from God as we question His plans and become angry.  It can also turn us towards Him as we realize that He is God, and we are not.  He is almighty and sees the whole picture while we can only see a slice of what’s really going on.  Will we trust Him even when life’s events are hard?

Thank you for allowing me to process through this here.  I pray that each of us will draw closer to God as we prepare our hearts to meet Him one day.  If you don’t know Jesus as your Savior, I pray that He would stir your heart and draw you to Himself.  Christ loves you dearly and He died for you.  He paid the penalty for your sin and my sin so that we can live with Him for all eternity in heaven.  If you believe this, ask Him to fill your being and make you alive in Him.  Talk to a friend who knows Jesus, or comment here for us to talk further.

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“I love you, O LORD, my strength.  The LORD is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer, my God, my rock in whom I take refuge, my shield, and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.  I call upon the LORD, who is worthy to be praised, and I am saved from my enemies.”  Psalm 18:1-3